Friday, March 13, 2009

Mood swinging (and singing)

I'm a woman in her 30s. I have hormones. Sometimes they assert themselves more strongly than others.

This shouldn't be news to anyone with a pulse.

I can easily tell when my hormone levels are up, because several qualities also assert themselves:

1) An uncontrollable desire to listen to Irish Christmas music featuring the fiddle, such as this, which turn inspires an uncontrollable urge to weep.

2) An uncontrollable crankiness with my co-workers, usually concluding when I've thrown a stack of folders to the ground.

3) An uncontrollable ability to listen to melodramatic songs on repeat, sing along, and dance down the street. This manifests most when I walk among the high rises on Boylston Street in the sunshine (like I did yesterday afternoon), or run along the Charles River at dusk (like I did last night) and see this view of the Back Bay from Cambridge (which indeed, looked exactly like this at that hour):

I've long been a fan of the composer Jason Robert Brown....his lyrics are earnest and heartbreaking without completely succumbing to cheese. Emotionally real. He's also a pianist....so his accompaniments are lyric, syncopated and feature nothing but pounding, satisfying left-hand bass lines.

So here's "Someone to Fall Back On" -- the song that I, also, strode home to last night. On repeat for 35 minutes. Hands in the air each time it came to the swell of the bridge 3 minutes in.

If some man would sing the bridge to me just once in my life, and mean it, I think I could die happy. (Of course, he could sing the whole song, while accompanying himself on the piano, and then I would really die happy.)

I’ll never be a knight in armor
With a sword in hand, or a kamikaze fighter;
Don’t count on me to storm the barricades
And take a stand, or hold my ground;
You’ll never see any scars or wounds -
I don’t walk on coals, I won’t walk on water:
I am no prince, I am no saint,
I am not anyone’s wildest dream,
But I can stand behind
And be someone to fall back on.

Some comedy - you’re bruised and beaten down
And I’m the one who’s looking for a favor.
Still, honestly, you don’t believe me
But the things I have are the things you need.
You look at me like I don’t make sense,
Like a waste of time, like it serves no purpose -
I am no prince, I am no saint,
And if that’s what you believe you need,
You’re wrong - you don’t need much,
You need someone to fall back on...

(Here's the bridge with the best lyrics ever)

And I’ll be that: I’ll take your side.
If I’m the only one, I’m used to that.
I’ve been alone,
I’d rather be the half of us,
The least of you,
The best of me.


And I will be your prince, I’ll be your saint,
I will go crashing through fences in your name.
I will, I swear -I’ll be someone to fall back on!
I’ll be the one who waits,
And for as long as you’ll let me,
I will be the one you need.
I’ll be someone to fall back on.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Karin,

Don't feel so badly. My now-married used to vent her frustrations out on me, her older, never-married brother, by throwing any of my books at me, and screaming rap lyrics (which, out of taste, I shall not repeat in public). She's now married and living in Florida, so chin up. Find the falcon that can hear the falconer.

Justin said...

Hi friend. JRB is good..very good. Give me a call sometime to chat.

singinflute said...

I have that song on my ipod too! I LOVE it! Ronny actually got me hooked on David Burnham. Check him out: http://www.davidburnham.com/