I've never hidden the fact that this blog serves a selfish function: to keep me accountable to someone besides God and myself in my desire to achieve certain goals. You may remember past quests on match.com. Or Craiglist. Or Weight Watchers and 35 days to a better everything.
So in the biggest cliché known to all, I now announce my official new year's publicity stunt: (drum roll, please)
The Bikini Challenge.
It came to me about 8:20 a.m. Saturday, while on mile 5 of an 8-mile Charles River run.
You should try it....running, that is.....during the waking moments of a January morning....when the sky is clear and the river is quiet.....and you hear only breathing and footfall. Everything seems possible.....washboard abs, among them. I want to be hard-body in a two-piece swimsuit by the time I visit my aunt and uncle in Florida, in March. (Granted, the crowd on the SW coast by Fort Myers is decidedly retiree.... nonetheless, a beach is a beach and it will be my first beach of the season.)
No other parameters, like losing a certain number of pounds. I just need to look good.....a subjective goal, if ever there were.
So exercise, the easy part. Training for a marathon. I have to run 20-40 miles a week for the next 3 months. And lift weights. And go to yoga. Or I die on April 20. So all I need to do is add 100 abdominal exercises a day. Woo-hoo!
So eating, also easy. After 3 months of inhaling several bags of Reeses Pieces per day, I declare official sugar-shock. Time for a break...and a January chocolate moratorium. That alone should remove several inches from my waist.
So all that is left is to set the goal date (booking my plane tix) and find the desired two-piecer. After which I will hang it in my bedroom on a hanger to walk by on my way to the shower, just like the girl in the Yoplait commercials. I will post a weekly update here on Sunday nights with the ins (and hopefully less frequent, particularly stomach and hip flesh) outs.
There will be no "before" picture. This is not The Biggest Loser. But you stick around to the bitter end........................
............I promise a picture of me in a family-friendly pose, wearing the suit. I promise.
However, play fair. Those of you with no desire to see me, in public, in a bikini, simply de-tune from the blog at the appointed hour. Do not feed me alcohol, caramel rolls, cheese or cotton candy while attempting to derail.
As always, stay tuned... and I will post the suit, hanging in bedroom, soon. And it will not have yellow polka dots, thank you very much.
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5 comments:
Yellow polka dots can be hot though! :)
Good luck, or perhaps I should wish you extra will power. If a bikini will do it, go for it. They say that having friends all trying for the same goal helps - is there anyone else who wants to join you?
Personally never having had abs of steel but having worn bikinis anyway (darn it, they're very practical and delightfully cool under the clothes when taking public transit to the beach), it might be fun to try to tone the abs of squish together. I have pilates and yoga and Karen Voight sitting (dustily) on the shelf...
And whatever you do, don't let Reeses Pieces anywhere near you. If they are there, you will eat them. If they are not there, you have a chance of coming to your senses before you scrape up enough change from your desk drawer to obtain them from the vending machine (that bane of willpower everywhere). Although on some days you might have to have your crew tie you to the mast.
Let me know when you're in FL for the big reveal and I'll drive to Ft Meyers and help you celebrate. I'm only 2 hours away and it would be great to see you again. I'm running another half in March, so hopefully my bod will be bikini ready too!
Amj, always looking for a partner in crime.... We can discuss...or I can just challenge you to a couple yoga tapes a week?
And no chocolate, no way. (Besides, I have to save my spare change for super glue runs....) I thought about allowing myself a treat once a week but it is just too dangerous. I eat one, I eat the bag.
I told a friend about my January chocolate moratorium. He suggested I'm starting Lent early! I think of it as my buffer until Ash Wednesdy when God starts watching me
I just read the Bikini Challenge! Very entertaining! And by the way: Wow in that bikini! I always knew that bod was there; just never saw it! :)
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