Independent: to be or not (want, sometimes) to be

If you ask Michael about my most recent Saturday, he'll tell you it was historically aggravating.

We hung out that night, during which he was a very good FwaB. As we drove Memorial Drive in Cambridge and pulled up to a stoplight, he listened to my griping about the aggravating things that had gone on earlier in the day: My cat's infected tooth, fever, and the $2000 veternarian bill that ensued. My wrecked apartment, in chaos due to the effort required to put said cat in a carrier for the trip that would result in the $2000 vet bill. The handle on the driver's side door of my Mazda 626 that, inexplicably, stopped working while I stopped at Dunkin' Donuts to drown sorrows in an iced coffee after learning of $2000 vet bill.

Then, back at the stoplight, when someone knocked on the passenger door, saying the front right tire of the 626 was flat, Michael didn't flinch when my response was "f***, f***, f***, f***, f***, f***!" (And he didn't argue when I insisted we drive on to Arlington, as planned.) Later, after attending the show we had been driving to, we did stop to change the tire. The car rolled back on the jack, damaging it, rendering it inoperable; Michael calmly pulled out his cellphone and we together looked for a towing company phone number.

All this is to say: a) thanks, Michael, for calm, for company; and b) Michael's presence made me appreciate the ease with which decisions are made when 2 rational people combine wits to solve a problem.

If there were ever a better incentive to continue on my dating quest with high vigor, I haven't found it. Sometimes being independent and alone sucks. It certainly did as I stood Saturday in an examining room at Neponset Animal Hospital, listening to my expensive, more expensive and most expensive options for treating the ill-timed illness of my cat. At one point--as the vet and tech stood waiting for my answer--I covered my eyes with my hand, just wanting someone else to make the decision. Someone else to give their opinion on whether I should euthanize the cat before agreeing to fund eight days of IV medication and a tooth extraction. Someone else to also put their name on the new line of credit I was opening to pay for it.

I was tired of it just being me.