Tuesday, December 8, 2009

If only he never had to write....

A couple nights ago, in the OKC inbox:

hello dear

what a nice lady u are I would like to talk to you more and know u better if you interrest just keep in touch see you bye!
Spam alert, of course.

Or maybe not. Just a moment later, he had sent a second message, this one more targeted :


and I saw that u are a pianist also Im a pianist too I got dgree from julliard school in newyork:)
Ah, the courting ritual on OKC these days: first, troll for sex; second, check for common interests.

But Julliard for piano? Worth at least a minor delve.

It was as expected .... the prose of someone not familiar with English.. Half-Turkish half-Italian, he says, and in Boston as a concert pianist. Three of his 4 photos are of him playing, 1 showing him furiously ripping on a Chopin score. He is 26. When he is not practicing, he likes to go clubbing. (Or, in his spelling, "clupping.")

One of the very first posts on this blog described how a perfectly nice guy with a perfectly nice profile lost my allegiance when he revealed himself as a poor writer. More recently, I connected with a young man in Wisconsin with whom I almost fell in love on the strength of his wit and our shared facility for literary seduction, even if he proved to be a total troll.

I want to be attracted to talented, fun-loving people even if their language skills grind obnoxiously on my ear .... my brain .... my sensibility .... my libido ....

But it's not happening.

Writing isn't everything. Although, perhaps good writing is just too crucial and I'll have to face it, Julliard or not.

Perhaps I need to stress that criteria next time I update the profile?


ECS said...

one thing I've learned after dating in an environment where English is mostly the second or third language is that writing is often the last thing people grasp. What if these guys could all whisper the most glorious phrases to you in person?

I agree that someone writing like that would grind my eyeballs but I've been now dating someone for 2 years who can only write purely functional scientific English (and uses "u" instead of "you" in text messages which still TOTALLY bugs me)

however, he's fun-loving, talented, and totally charming and sweet in person, with no lack of spoken language skills. Plus, I get to learn a new language from him which is fun.

Karin said...

@ECS. Thanks for the perspective. I know I have a snobbery that sometimes gets the best of me...I'm sure if I had to write in Italian, for example, I would also certainly not impress!

(congrats on your man, incidentally...)

Random Blog Reader said...

Sex may sell, but not in the form of a spam e-mail as a first contact. This seems to be a very difficult concept for lots of guys to understand, whether English is their first language or not. If Mr. Juilliard had only sent the second e-mail, you might be looking at his written English more charitably.