Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Over No Hill (thank you very much)

Yesterday I worked through lunch until 6:30 p.m., after which I ran 4 miles and then stopped off at a friend's house to rehearse some songs, before riding the B Line to Allston to hang with a friend and a bunch of his friends while imbibing some truly smooth Atwater Vanilla Java Porter, before riding the B Line to the Red Line to the 15-minute walk home ....

So. By the time I dropped my backpack on the kitchen floor and kicked off my shoes, the hour was approaching late and what more could I possibly have been in the mood for after such social frivolity.... but a hop onto OKC to see if anyone was up and in the mood for more social frivolity.

It was a fruitful choice. An acquaintance I'd chatted with a couple times last fall appeared and we fell into a benign, amiable conversation about our shared interests: running (he's an ultra-marathoner) and blogging (which because of his running success, for various reasons, is also a success). At one point, he was talking about a 125-mile run (you read right). I was feeling small potatoes:

Karin: So my 5 miles yesterday is really impressing you, I can tell...

Runner-Blogger: It actually is... I'm always impressed when people get out for a run. Its one of the hardest things to do

K: It's very exhilarating to me .... running, when it feels good. It doesn't always. These last couple of days have felt fabulous, which is always great, because it makes me want to do more.

R-B: I wish I was older.
I feel like if I was.. I might actually have a chance with you.
We really hadn't been talking about chances of any sort. Or anything other than running and blogging. Tone-shift 180.

K: ? Do you feel as if you don't?

R-B: sorta..

R-B: I mean.. I'm just a young 28 yr old with a babyface

R-B: still a student, no steady job

R-B: I live an hour from you

R-B: ....
So then, I'm thinking .... why did this man, 28, start talking to me in the first place? And why was it only after talking and determining we had some real points in common, that he decided age was indeed a factor? And why had he already decided that I would never consider him?

OKC's site hosts a blog called "OkTrends," in which they "compile data from the hundreds of millions of user interactions on the site to explore the data side of the online dating world." One of their more recent studies, drowning in data, is called The Case for An Older Woman.

It's a good read and contains many beautiful rainbow charts. I'll leave it to you if you want to. But I like their findings which, as the blog's author and researcher states after a lengthy introduction of men's proclivities to find younger mates:

"I will show that an older woman's attitudes, both about sex and life, are just as good if not better than her younger counterparts', and hopefully I'll convince more guys to venture north of their current age-limits."


singinflute said...

So...are you giving this guy a chance? ;)

Anonymous said...

I think MANY guys are just out for an ego stroke. You can take that figuratively or literally. But if a guy really wants to go out with you, he doesn't wish he really had a chance or fish around. He just asks you out.


veggiegal said...

Hmmm, maybe he is just shy? Maybe that was his way of "testing the waters" - see if you'd go for it? Personally, I'd be more worried about the student part than the age part - student means it will be a while before he figures out his life. That said, might be worth asking: "was that your way of trying to gather how I would respond to a date request?" - that is - if you think you might indeed be interested in one...