State of the Union

So I've mentioned I'm on jury duty for a couple weeks, for a trial that started today.

The good news:   so far I'm totally engrossed.  As a blogger, consumed with self-reflection, it's a rare treat to have to think so hard and seriously about someone other than oneself.  And I'll reveal nothing more, not wanting to be one of those people responsible for a mistrial.

The other news:  today's lunch hour was unexpectedly 90 minutes long.  And I failed to bring either reading material or my laptop, and had already downed the entire Tuesday Times while waiting for the morning session to start.   No worries.  It was a sunny, breezy day, so I picked up a fresh iced black-eye, headed onto the "brick desert" of City Hall Plaza, and laid back on a step to stare up at the clouds for an hour.

Chill. 

Me being me in my current me-ness ... idle thoughts turned to my dating life, currently in a solid neutral. Connections are there:  occasional suggestive chat with one of the bare-chested OKC dudes (lucid but prone to writing in the wee hours just as I'm signing off). Occasional text from the CFO, checking in. Dating and physical-therapy advice swaps with Young Scientist. And a couple outings with a match.com concert-goer with whom I seem to be trending in a comfortable (albeit, friend-like) direction.

Which are all well and good.  No grand passions but, then again, my past grand passions have all been eventual heartbreakers.  Once in awhile it is nice to just chill. Maybe re-evaluate where I want any of these connections to go. Or if it is worth continuing to go with them.

Into this mix comes an OKC message today from a Man who gets no name or defining qualities, other than he does seem to know what he wants:  me.    To illustrate, the Man cut and pasted several of the OKC profile questions, plus my responses, then gave his own further replies in not uncreative fashion:

Question "I spend a lot of time thinking about"     

K:  .... how much I wished I was living with someone with strong hands so I could request a massage at will. 

M: .... well, at least when I am 'at hand' live and in person, my hands will be at your beck and call, I am not a professional, but all my friends who are say I have skill and energy a plenty.  It is almost as pleasurable to give a good massage as to receive, (must be a "mirror neuron" thang) so...got that one covered too, check! ;)

Q:  My 6 things I couldn't live without ...

K:  #3:  "The New Yorker."

M:  damn, reminds me i gotta get my script renewed and stop waiting for my mom to hand over batches after she's done...

The reason you should message me is ...

K:  you need a little light in your life and Debby Boone just isn't doing it for you. 

M: that's so sweet/romantic and so funny at the same time you should be a writer..oh, wait a sec, you are, eye c!   ciao bella!

I was already falling under your spell just from reading thus far- now I am certain

I mean not at all to mock and hope I am not. It's all very sweet and anyone who utilizes "ciao bella" deserves a reply.  I've just tried this exact approach several times with certain men's online profiles.  Smitten with his picture/profile combo.  Going down the checklist of his profile traits determining I fit 98 percent of them. Convinced if I respond point-by-point he will be convinced right back. 

Which in hindsight hasn't worked, yet -- no such men have ever responded.  Which I admit will most likely be my reaction to this Man here -- other than a thank you for the hello -- and not for any lack of effort or sweetness on his part. More because I checked out his profile, believe that the odds are slim we might be compatible, and am not willing to pursue.

Who knows.

It just serves to remind me the myriad of elusive qualities that have to fall into place for a romantic connection to even take one small step off the ground.  Even profound, perceived compatibility sometimes isn't enough.