Round One: TKO

Sorry for not explaining the Reeses Pieces inhalation in fuller detail. (And a shout-out to my college buddy KLK for wondering about the inadvertant shout-out to E.T.....following the candy home.) I know some are awaiting with breathless anticipation.

My date Wednesday with the gentleman from New Hampshire revived a constant self-debate: whether a man's writing personality is crucial to my relationship success. In the two weeks we corresponded via e-mail, this man's style was friendly and reserved. He asked questions about the interests on my profile, and responded to my questions in full details. There was no hint of cheekiness....so in turn, there was no real excitement. But as I've theorized.....some folks are writers, some are not, and that doesn't mean a more dynamic personality does not lie within.

As we shared a couple drinks and buffalo wings (messy, lip-burning and awkward to eat gracefully), said gentleman was friendly and reserved. He asked questions about my interests on my profile and responded to my questions with full detail. There was no hint of cheekiness....so in turn, there was no real excitement.

I knew it and thought it about five minutes into the conversation. Waiting for a table, I commented on the day's big news: Mass Senator Ted Kennedy's malignant brain tumor. Start out by talking about current events, or the weather, to break the ice.

"Oh, I really don't pay attention to all that Kennedy stuff," he responded.

Not rudely. But closing off the subject. Either inexperienced at social gracefulness, or not interested in political debate. Both of these qualities, if not crucial, are at least a bonus....and immediately he was two points in the hole.

Later, I told him about my church social life and engineering friends there-in. (His field of study in college, although he now works in computers.) Turns out he's agnostic and dislikes engineering, would never get a job in it....and said both of these things in response. Again closing off the subject without introducing a new one.

At that point I was not unhappy, but knew we had nothing in common. However, we were only halfway through the chicken wings.....spicy, messy foods having to be eaten slowly.

Meanwhile, I learned a lesson about the effectiveness, and inherent misleading nature, of social niceities....such as a friendly goodbye handshake. I was under the impression that all arrows pointed to our incompability. Yet, did I I not convey.....? My gentleman e-mailed me Thursday morning: nice to meet you, look forward to catching up with you next week.

I sent him the unfortunate, unamibiguous brush-off e-mail today.

Onto the next round!