Thursday, June 16, 2011

(Laying low) in the city of champions

Two friends posted these status updates on their Facebook pages this morning:

Mike writes:
"Boston, Massachusetts: Superbowl XXXVI (2002) Champions, Superbowl XXXVIII (2004) Champions, 2004 World Series Champions, Superbowl XXXIX (2005) Champions, 2007 World Series Champions, 2008 NBA Champions, 2011 Stanley Cup Champions. 10 years, 7 championships! Boston, city of champions, YOU'RE MY HOME!!!!"

Matt writes:
"In my ten years in Boston I have witnessed 3 Super Bowl champs, 2 World Series, 1 NBA champ, and now a Stanley Cup. What city should I take my sports luck to next???"
While I have embraced the Red Sox and the Celtics (Kevin Garnett!) through their successes, I'll confess that the Bruins have rarely made it onto my radar. In fact, when in Minneapolis over Memorial Day, my (hockey-loving) brother-in-law commented one morning, "Wow, so your team is in the Stanley Cup finals!"  I didn't even know they had made the playoffs.

So went my rationale for not jumping in and "revelling with long-suffering fans in the promised land" last night, despite the children "running down the streets of Southie with sparklers."  Sure, I was tired and needed to go to bed anyway. I also thought, perhaps, the true Beantown loyals would see straight into my faux-celebratory-you're-just-out-here-for-the-public-drinking hypocrisy, and I wasn't in the mood for a swearing match. 

Cool, though, for everyone here who does really care.  Sincerely.  A Championship City isn't a bad place to be.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Good help is easy to find

It isn't every day in a girl's life that the rear wheel of her bicycle pops off-chain in mid-pedal at a random Southie corner when she's already 20 minutes late for work.

It isn't every day, either, at that random corner, that a contractor (about her age) will be sitting in his van waiting for a job to start when he sees the girl's bike malfunction and, by the time she has flipped the frame on its end to investigate the chain disaster, come over to offer help, saying, "I was wondering how you were going to fix that without getting totally dirty." And then take over and completely fix it, blackening his hands.

And who knew that while the girl watched random contractor at random corner fixing her bike not a minute after it malfunctioned, a second man (about her age) would walk down the cross street and stop to say, "You got that under control? Do you need any help?" Followed by another random contractor (about her age) in black pick-up pulling over to ask the same question. Who would, upon hearing assurances that all was well, yell out his window "Do you need anything to wipe your hands with? I have this whole stack of napkins here...."

Followed, then, by a fourth man (about her age), walking a nervous Chihuahua, who stopped as the girl reassembled herself for the bike ride to work and said, "Hey! How's it going?"

Seems like my key to meeting folks in the hood is to have something go wrong.

Thanks, gentlemen of Southie.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Kiss for the road

Before you chastise me
for doing it again,

Let me confirm
I didn't plan to end up
again
sharing my passenger seat with
C-2 
on an early Monday morning,
kissing
(and doing other things).

I didn't know until Sunday
that
he was in town until Monday.

I didn't know
he'd apologize
for never being around
or
tell me
he and his girlfriend were
on the outs.

I can confirm,
however,
that he had kissing me
on his mind
from the moment
he texted
and
invited me to Foley's.

I can confirm
I had the same
from the moment
I got the text.

I can confirm
the kissing
still wins every award
and that
physically connecting
to a lover
after too long apart
is like stepping into a
hot bath on a
cold night.

At one moment,
me lying back on the seat,
him lying full on me,
me grasping at his hair,
I said,
"I love being just like this."

And I meant it.
What else to say?

It doesn't mean
I didn't realize
this was just
for old times' sake,
that he was leaving,
that he might be back
sometime
and
he very well might not
and
even if he does,
it doesn't mean anything
more than
kissing.

Expectations are
temporarily
safely
uninflated.

Even if
the kissing is
very, very nice.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Always a bridesmaid....

Last weekend was Joshua's wedding, August of 2009 was Justin's wedding, and in 6 months I'll be standing up for Cousin J and her husband-to-be.

These 3, among select others, are 3 of the dearest people to me. I'd be lying if I didn't confess to mixed feelings at their marriages ... in all 3 cases, gratefulness for their loves and the undeniable fact that our relationships by necessity will / did / could change.

It is a difficult emotion to express without it coming out like jealousy.

Which is why when I read this "Coupling" column in the Boston Globe this weekend, I could relate:
"Surely I can’t be the only person who feels like weddings are a bit of a rejection – two people announcing in public that they love each other more than they love you."
But instead of succumbing to unhappiness, she goes on to suggest that there should be likewise celebration of friendships.
"Can we just take a moment to marvel at the fact that there are people in this world willing to chip in for your birthday cocktails and hold your hair back after you disappear them, even though there is zero chance you’ll ever give them grandchildren – or hickeys?"
Which I liked. I know I've oft marveled at Joshua (scholar and singer), Justin (performer and producer) and Cousin J (traveler and tough-love) in this space. None of them have given me hickeys. But even though things have of course changed, none stopped being my friends since finding their better halves.

Which for a cloudy Monday, isn't a bad sentiment to marvel at.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Friday Happy

Last September, Claudia and I had way more fun than allowed in singing along to "American Pie" with the Boston Pops during their free anniversary concert in the Common.  To wit:


Yesterday I randomly re-encountered this song via YouTube; it's gone viral so you've probably already seen it.  Seems the city of Grand Rapids, Michigan, created a 9-minute single-tracking-shot version of the McLean original, featuring thousands of the city's residents lip-syncing along.


Screw men. I'm totally in love with this song and, by extension, Grand Rapids. I get so happy watching this it makes me (almost) want to move there.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Another reason I'm glad to not be on Twitter...

Since you can't open any website in the Western world this week without reading about Anthony Weiner, the Congressman from New York and his body photos (naked chest with no head as a pick-up technique, of course!) and his wronged wife and now-wronged political career ....

.... and this here blog focuses on body photos and silly men and wronged women and how politics could (or so far, has not) save my dating life ....

I don't feel strongly on the subject of this man and his life and his ability to be in Congress, truly. This is not because he's a Democrat and I'm mad because I don't want Democrats to be caught being so patently stupid. It's my conviction, cliched as it is, that there are more important things than the story of a man sending sex messages to a woman not his wife and lying about it, as if it doesn't happen 5 million times a day, in patently more tasteless and debasing ways.

In fact, on Monday when breaking news flashes began popping about the press conference where he admitted to his indiscretions, I just wanted it all to go away. I managed to avoid reading about it at all until yesterday, when every pundit with a command of English had something to say, and curiosity overcame reticence. In doing so I came across Salon.com blogger Glenn Greenwald -- who I also usually avoid because of his general over-the-topness, despite obvious intelligence -- and was glad I did, because I found his take on it (first paragraph below) summing up well my current opinion:
"There are few things more sickening -- or revealing -- to behold than a D.C. sex scandal. Huge numbers of people prance around flamboyantly condemning behavior in which they themselves routinely engage. Media stars contrive all sorts of high-minded justifications for luxuriating in every last dirty detail, when nothing is more obvious than that their only real interest is vicarious titillation. Reporters who would never dare challenge powerful political figures who torture, illegally eavesdrop, wage illegal wars or feed at the trough of sleazy legalized bribery suddenly walk upright -- like proud peacocks with their feathers extended -- pretending to be hard-core adversarial journalists as they collectively kick a sexually humiliated figure stripped of all importance. The ritual is as nauseating as it is predictable."
It plays well into my opinion that public figures never do well to kick other public figures; it leaves them baldly open to ridicule when they, too, are found to have sinned. The folks all excited about kicking Weiner out of a job (see: Dems and Repubs and media figures alike who let another Congressional Rep, Michelle Bachmann, run around spouting nonsense daily, unchecked) should have to come clean about their own extracurricular sex lives. If only all our personal foibles were so harshly dissected as this one ... and if politicians were routinely held accountable for actions that actually affect anyone besides the people directly involved.  Weiner has been serving the constitutents of NYC in Congress for 12 years .... New York City, folks ... and this is the only thing he can be accused of doing that warrants resignation?

My friend Jodi posted on Facebook today yet another great take -- from Undecided, a blog written by a friend in Santa Barbara, which also cites a compelling Time magazine article -- expressing amazement at that Weiner's chest and jockey shorts get more attention than broader issues of sexism:
"If this were the sort of country where the women of Yale and Walmart were given as much play as Weiner’s weiner, where corporate pay–and maternity–policy demonstrated that women were valued, well, I wonder if powerful men–and the women they sext–would behave any differently. And I wonder this, too: What’s it going to take, to make substance as sexy as scandal?"
For a more humorous take, check out TV My Wife Watches, where I knew Evan would have to weigh in on something both media and chest-related .... even though he is usually discussing women's chests. He hired a guest blogger to dissect Weiner's indiscretions in his "Wednesday's Wifey" feature, and as a long-time online dater, I couldn't help but agree with her incredulity:
"Many of his online girlfriends have confirmed that their cyber-relationships started off with simple conversation starters like 'you’re hot' or 'wow what a stud.'
"Is that honestly all it takes to seduce a man!? I’ve been trying to figure out men for SO LONG. A little bit of leg but not too much. Let him know you’re smart but also a little vulnerable. When he walks you home, just pop your nipple out for a second. Easy on the fart jokes. And all this time, the only thing I've ever had to do is say 'Wow, you're hot'!?"
And finally: this.

Anyway. Probably enough discussion of a subject I didn't think warranted discussion.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Sauté

This castigation of Sunday-night Man was, really, my last great verbal purge towards a guy I dated.

(Give me credit for being a less vitriolic single woman than I was almost 5 months ago. Or, rate this accomplishment considering almost 5 months ago was my last real date? Word.)

Sunday-night Man had just finished culinary school when we met. He also didn't lack ego or self-regard for his talents. Not surprising then, the night I hosted him at my apartment, that he took over the stove with his improved ideas for the chicken dish I had planned. "Hijacked" is a better word for it: he went on to do the whole meal. Me, dewy-eyed and forgiving because a man was cooking my groceries.  Didn't mind his critique of how ineffectively I sauteed vegetables in olive oil, followed by a play-by-play of his own wrist technique.

(You might recall I thought he was an ass about it.)

Last night I was working together a pan of squash, mushrooms and onions to add to my store-bought spaghetti sauce, and found myself quite without thinking, effectively sauteeing in the style Sunday-night Man showed me: jerk the pan back towards you to flip the goods, not push forward. Something I rarely remember to do.

Seriously. The result was tasty and evenly browned.

Nice to know that even men who unceremoniously dump people can be good for something...

Monday, June 6, 2011

Depends on your definition of the word

From an unsolicited message this weekend, my new favorite OKCupid pick-up line

(for real my favorite and for real, a message):
"Are you available for short term data?"

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Joshua's getting married!

Spiky-haired
Michigan boy
Loping down my street
In the Fenway
That sunny July Sunday
Eleven years ago.

A memorable August.

Watching Al Gore get the nomination.
Discovering Bacardi shots.
Dancing every night
(or so we recall now).

Since then:

Hanging
Studying
Shooting more shots
(most often tequila)
Dancing some more
Moving away
Moving back
Studying a lot more
Coffee-shopping
Frisbee-throwing
Talking about dates
Political ranting
Drinking more
Singing more
Moving away again
And finally back
for good
With a job that's a Job.

Happy day.

Today is another such day.
A new day, really, since
The boy is getting married on it.


The last time we talked
we theorized our friendship
had no reason to change after today.

I'm going to hold him to that theory.
And wish them both the very best.

Thursday, June 2, 2011